I was told I waited too long!
Yesterday we had a visit with a speech therapist and an educator. Just a little background as to why we chose to wait and or get help. Lil Tony is 27 months and he is still not talking. He is so intelligent in every other area and very independent. We encouraged him to be that way. We don’t lock the fridge and the only places there are gates is leading in to the laundry room and up the stairs. So basically he has full access to everything he may need. If he wants a drink he gets it out of the fridge, gets on the counter and gets a cup and brings it to us. We have other forms of communication other than verbally.
We had Lil Tony at a doctor at 12 months and the doc didn’t seem concerned he wasn’t talking. We had him in there at 15 months and the doc didn’t seem concerned. He said that if he wasn’t talking by 18 months that we should maybe look in to it. We were never referred until about 21 months and that was right before we moved to Virginia. So at this point things are working for Lil Tony. He gets what he wants without having to talk, why change, right?
See here is the kicker, I know he can say things because about 4 months ago I said “say Nicki” and without hesitation or anything he said “Icki”. We were all excited and asked him to say it again. Well then he just laughed at us and never said it again.
The concern started becoming more serious about a month or so ago when his frustration started increasing. He is getting more angry and the fits are more often and louder. I know he is going through “terrible twos” but this is something more. With the arrival of a new baby in just 3 short weeks and the fact that Isabel is getting older and starting to imitate the way her brother acts I decided enough was enough.
So a couple weeks ago when we had a well visit at the doctor, we expressed our concerns and he referred us to a speech therapist. After all the initial meetings and insurance verification we finally had an appt yesterday.
Two very nice ladies came to the door along with Kathy who does all the paper work and such and we all met and got comfy. Lil Tony had just gotten up from nap so he was a little cranky and unsure of what these ladies were doing here. Thankfully Tony was home and so was Nicki. Tony was able to sit on the floor with Lil Tony, the educator and the speech therapist. The speech therapist mostly observed Lil Tony and his actions and the educator “played” with Lil Tony. Showed him blocks and wanted him to do certain activities, gave him paper and pencil and wanted him to trace lines and draw, among a few other activities. When it was all said and done they had a better knowledge as to Lil Tony’s development.
First was the motor skills, now keep in mind Lil Tony is 27 1/2 months and he has a 33 month level of knowledge. So he is advanced in his motor skills. The disturbing news was his verbal skills, he is only developed to a 10 month old. It was a little bit of a shocker, I mean I thought it was pretty low of an age but to actually here someone else say it was hard to handle. The positive thing I got from it is they do think he is extremely intelligent and that he is just set in his ways and finds no need to change. Not that he is slow or has any mental development issues.
I mean the kid is smart, give him a screw driver and he will take apart his toys, sit him in front of a computer and he will pull up an internet browser, type (nothing that makes sense just random letters)in the search box and click on the search button. Ask him to close the browser window and he will, he can find music saved on the computer and play it. He is just really smart. Anything I ask him to do, he understands what I am asking but he refuses to talk.
Well the speech therapist says that we have to chose the time to make the change and we all (as a family) have to work together to implement the changes. She wants us to lock our fridge and make it more difficult to have access to things so he has to ask for them. She says things that he really wants we need to not give in when he fusses for it and we need to be consistent in trying to get him to repeat words. One of the things he likes is juice, whether it’s apple juice or koolaid he likes it. We don’t have it often but when we do he wants to drink it, which he needs to have poured for him. So the speech therapist says that when he goes for the juice we need to try and get him to say the word or refuse to give it to him. She expressed that this is going to be a painful and stressful transition but she is sure it will work.
Let’s just say today was mildly rough. I realized just how much we give in when he whines and fusses. I think because Lil Tony is so smart that is just one step ahead of us, he doesn’t scream and fuss anymore than normal when he can’t have something. I am worried he is just going to start “living without” the things he wants that we are refussing to give unless he talks. He whined for juice several times today and never got any because he refused to say anything and by the end of the day, yeah he still tried but his desire to have some didn’t last long.
This process is going to be long. Both the speech therapist and educator felt we waited too long to get help. I am frustrated because just like everything else I just felt that when he was ready he would do it. Most other milestones were well before they should have happened. We explained it was mostly because of the pediatricians not showing much concern. The speech therapist says she will work with us until his 3rd birthday which is in July and then the services will have to stop ( I guess it doesn’t go past 3 yrs) but then they will get us set up with a Head Start program. I was not planning on putting him in any pre-school and anything but we will see how he develops.
All in all I am really happy to finally be working with someone that can help us. I am sorry I waited so long and now I have to work with this stressful transition and the arrival of a new baby. I should have again listened to my motherly instincts and did something about it a yr ago.
November 14th, 2009 at 3:02 pm
Aww don’t worry yourself with it. At least you are taking the steps now to help correct it. You are a great mother and I’m sure you all will do just fine. Sounds as if the previous Dr should have listened to you. Good Luck!!